What a blessing it was for us to visit our family in Oklahoma last weekend. Friday evening we got into town and our first stop was to see Chris, Elijah, Sarah and Caleb. My Mom, sister Amanda and her family and Brother Nathan and his wife Bre came over. Chris grilled out and it was delicious! More importantly the company was great!
We hung out all evening and then we went to my Mom's to unpack and go to bed. So that we could be up early to meet family and some church family at the pumpkin patch. I think this was one of my favorite times of the weekend. Just watching everyone enjoy themselves. Of course those cousins have a lot of fun no matter where we are.
Amanda and Elizabeth were unable to come because Lizzie had gotten sick the night before.
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My sister Stephanie and her family came to visit me at my Mom's Saturday afternoon.
Amanda and her family and Chris and the kids came to Mom's for dinner and to hang out Saturday night.
I took the kids outside while Mom and Amanda finished up dinner and the guys were talking.
Caden giving Caleb a kiss
Pretty Lizzie
Cutie Caleb
Kiddos playing ball
Little Monkey Caleb
After dinner Carolina read Caleb her books
That was the best day I have had in a long time! The day, my family was like salve to my heart. I miss my sister so very much!! I was worried that in going to Oklahoma there was going to be a moment that it all seemed real all of a sudden and just knocked me down. That wasn't true in fact it feels just as not possible now as it did before I went. Coming back home was so much harder than being there.
Being with those who love me and love Brandy and her family was amazing. I wish more and more everyday that I could go home to Oklahoma to stay. I know that there has to be a reason that God has us here but I am not feeling it right now. I am thankful that now that I have started going back to the kids school that a few of my friends are reaching out. Talking with them and realizing that I matter to them has given me a since of normalcy. Even if it's not what I feel all the time it is nice to feel it again! Being at the school and staying busy is also helping in the normalcy department and even though it is hard to leave this house and at times I can hardly make myself. I really need to do it as much as possible and even everyday. I was really surprised how lonely I have felt and the few friends here that I thought would be there for me just weren't anywhere to be found. I know they are just busy and maybe uncomfortable talking to me now. I am not really sure. I just have to keep telling myself that God has a friend for me someone who I will be able to talk to and relate to. The more I get out and talk with friends the less it seems to matter. Maybe God just wanted to make sure it was Him and Anthony that I counted on during that time in my life.
While in Oklahoma Chris's Mom gave me a book to read, a lady at our church there gave me a book also. (Our church here gave me a booklet also) I have read the beginning of the one Nancy gave me. I haven't had time to read much of it because it was a busy week. I would of read it on the way home last week but I get motion sick. It is helping me to understand a few things that I thought I knew. Growing up in church I felt sure I knew how God worked. I am finding that I do not know as much as I thought I did. The book is called Why: Making Since of God's Will. Like I said I haven't read much but the part I read makes me know I need to finish it. I somehow believed that it was God's will for Brandy to go, however it maybe more because of man's free will. Although I do know that God could of kept her here had he wanted. I am still very very confused and may always be. However I do feel this book will be helpful. I also can see with my own eyes how God is talking care of Chris and the kids.
When we left Oklahoma Monday morning we stopped at Chris's to have one last visit. It was a nice visit. Not too short but still not near long enough.
Here is a collage I made with my phone of these sweet cousins
A video of Caleb This is my very favorite!!!
I have this video that we made for Brandy's Home~going service. I have watched almost everyday most day's several times. It has helped me so much. I wasn't planning to share it. However I know that so many people loved Brandy and most have probably not been able to watch the video since the service. Some maybe couldn't even make it. So I thought I would share it. Chuck did a great job on the video I think it is a testament to the kind of person Brandy was. So much love. I think that is what I feel most when watching it. . . Love, Peace and the wonderful memories.
Thank you all for your continued prayers for our family and mostly for Chris and the kids. Seeing them with my own eyes I have no doubt it is only by the grace of God that they are doing so well. God is good. I know they have to have their struggles but I also know that God has given Chris an extra amount of everything he needs to get though each day. Chris is an amazing testament to God and His love for us!
I want to share one more thing. My Friend Rachael niece's name is Ashley Kate. They have a blog and a little girl who could use a lot of prayers right now. I know that the family appreciates all the prayers they can get. This little girl and her family have been such an inspiration in my life.
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